Riggins would have turned 9 today which is hard to believe. I still hear his sweet voice and cute laugh when he was 5 about to turn 6. I love and miss you so much Riggins. Happy 9th Birthday.
#99- Riggins 9th Birthday
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Riggins would have turned 9 today which is hard to believe. I still hear his sweet voice and cute laugh when he was 5 about to turn 6. I love and miss you so much Riggins. Happy 9th Birthday.
I have my sister in law Keshia, niece Faith and nephew Ran on to talk about what July 25, 2021 was for each of us and what we were doing when we got the news. Talking about Trauma is hard. There is so much my family has not talked about still. The more you talk, the easier it becomes to find the right words. It takes effort, just like anything else in life. I'm so proud of my family in this episode. 3 years later it still hurts the same, maybe worse. The more time goes on the more I havent seen them. That is really difficult to accept. What I have learned so far is how much I really loved Kortni, Riggins, Franki, Race and Rider. Death has shown me that. I have learned that the gratitude, the joy, the love, the growth to be had from this horror is located in the same place as the pain. I ran from the pain for so long but that was also causing me to run away from Kortni and Riggins and Franki and Race and Rider. It still hurts, really bad. Continuing to talk about them and how I feel on the inside as allowed me to also find gratitude and love along with the pain now. I didnt have that at the beginning. Kortni, Riggins, Franki, Race, Rider. We love you and miss you so much. I never thought this would be our life and journey together. But it is, so what are we going to do about it?
"I remember when I turned 33" I am 6 months older than Kortni and so every time she had a birthday I would say "I remember when I turned..." I think she laughed hard the first time I did it and then rolled here eyes for the next 15 years when I did it haha. Where I am currently at in my grief journey is having the idea that Kortni and Riggins and Franki are somewhere. I am not sure what form or shape that is in but they are somewhere together and it is a struggle for them. Just like it is a struggle for Blue and I and the rest of our family. Kortni always found a way to help people and have a positive influence in the worst of circumstances. Even though Kortni is dealing with grief too I know she would be handling it well with a combo of grace and fury. She keeps me going, she gets me out of bed. She has always been a great leader and role model to me. I got to have some Kortni's friends on. (sorry to all the freinds we didnt have on haha kort would have felt bad) Thank you to her friends Shelbi and Madi who went to middle school with Kortni and played high school basketball with her. We had Kort's friend Aria on too who worked as a nurse with Kortni. My absolute favorite thing is hearing stories about Kortni, especially ones I have never heard of before. So thank you to Shelbi, Madi and Aria I felt Kortni's spirit so strongly talking to all of you at the same time. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KORTNI! LOVE YOU FOREVER.
Got to talk with Conner Furu and what he has been through in his life. We both talked a lot about how sports has played a pivotal role in our lives. It was fun to relate with someone like him in that way. Conner is a man of his word and you get a sense of his integridy and accountability in this episode I think. One of my favorite quotes from him says; "The inferno of our grief is fueled by our refusal to acknowledge it, and extinguished by our attempts to undertand it." Grief at times does feel like an inferno and I think Conner is right. If you refuse to talk about it then it only feeds it and makes it bigger. Only by talking about it can you actually extinguish it. Thanks for showing up and being on our show Conner
June 29th is Franki's Birthday. I miss you so much Frank, can't believe you would be 5! June 29th is also Kortni and my 11th anniversary. I wrote you guys a letter and wanted to read it on here so we would always have it. I love and miss you both so much.
On this episode of The 10 Ninety Podcast we talk with Kelly Jewel. 14 years ago Kelly lost her husband Clint to Leukemia. Mason and Kelly talk about the importance of talking about your grief throughout your life because the grief will be with you forever. Mason and Kelly talk about the battle you have with hope as you're going through trauma. Kelly talks about how the grief of Clint's passing has been on her mind more as her kids get older. Kelly talks about the moments before Clint's passing, hyper fixating on small moments, and how opening up about her pain helps her carry it better.
On this episode of the 10 Ninety Podcast we interview Kimberly Howard. On June 28th, 2013 Kimberly lost her son Keaton to a boating accident at Lake Powell. Mason and Kimberly talk about how there's no way to prepare for grief. They talk about the importance of feeling all of the emotions that come with trauma, life's synchronicities, and understanding that every person grieves differently.
On this episode of the 10 Ninety podcast we interview Brie Ocea. On July 4, 2022 Brie lost her son Romeo to a drowning accident. Brie shares with us details about the day of the accident and her experience dealing with grief. Mason and Brie talk about the difficulties of sharing their stories to help others while also dealing with the criticism and the perception other people may have of them. They talk about the difficulties of losing a child so young because others will never know them like they did. They talk about the unfairness of them being unable to experience all that this life has to offer.
On this episode of The 10 Ninety podcast we interview Kuri Bolger. On March 5th 2022 Kuri and her family were involved in an F4 tornado in Winterset Iowa. Kuri, her son Brysen, her brother, and her stepfather were the only survivors. Kuri lost her husband Mike Bolger, her daughter Kinlee, her son Owen, and her mother Melissa Bazley. In this episode Mason and Kuri talk about the difficulties of grieving multiple people at the same time. They also talk about how the best way to honor the loved ones they have lost is to live a life they would be proud of. They talk about how sharing their grief with others has given them strength and helps them feel closer to the loved ones they have lost.
On this episode of The 10 Ninety Podcast Mason and Ryan talk about things that probably should be left to qualified professionals. We talk about top 10 states that struggle with suicide and depression and discuss whether there's a difference between grief and clinical depression. If you're hurting. Please talk to someone.
my therapist joins me again on the show to talk about ANXIETY. Why it's good and how it can be bad. I always enjoy having Matt on. I think he knows his stuff but I see him more as a buddy than a "therapist". Brindy (Matt's Wife) also joined us as well and talked a lot about breath work and breath therapy. Thanks guys, always love having you on Matt. Thanks for all you do for me.
Founder and CEO of the mental health franchise, Zion Healing inc. Robert went from being on top of the world in his 30's as a young millionaire after his company went public. Alcohol and other things took Robert from the top to the bottom, when he was homeless for two years on the streets of Salt Lake City. After nearly dying, Robert found his way back to the top and has found success in helping other people heal and battle their own addictions. Thanks Robert, you're the man.
Not sure how many people have experienced what Matt has. The pian he experiences is both improbable and cruel I think. How Matt endures it, is truly inspiring. Loved hearing his persepctive and what his 90% looks like. Thanks Matt! I admire your courage and ability to find a little beauty in a lot of ugly.
On this episode of The 10 Ninety Podcast we talk about Nathan from Australia. Throughout Nathan's life he has dealt with abandonment from parents, introduction to drugs and alcohol at an early age, and using anger to cope with his trauma. Nathan sought help from doctors and was not seeing improvements from the prescribed medication. After a number of different traumas that Nathan faced he eventually met Craig Lithgow. Craig opened up his heart to Nathan and this was the beginning of improvement for Nathan. Nathan's story is a reminder of the importance of human connection. Like Nathan we all seek connection through different ways. We talk about how genuine connection with people who care for you and show you love is some of the best medicine available.
On this episode of the 10 Ninety podcast we interview Parker Lee. We talk with Parker about the chaos you can invite into your life through people pleasing. How to balance the principle of we>me while living a life authentic to yourself. We talk about the importance of not comparing your pain to others.
Mason and Sam visit with Alec McMorris as he shares his inspirational story of survival and rehab after being hit by a pickup truck in Parley’s Canyon. This episode is sponsored by McMorris Deck’s and Structures. Call 801-834-8098 for a free estimate.
Mason and Sam visit with Carrie McKee as she shares her challenging story of surviving breast cancer and a traumatic divorce. Her strength and attitude will inspire. This episode is sponsored by Joel Carter. Check out his amazing artwork @jocahta.art Thanks for the support!
Happy Halloween! Sam and Mason answer questions sent in by listeners. Questions ranging from religion, pizza, sams dwarfism and more. Thank you for all our supporters it has meant so much to us.
Sam and Mason discuss the childrens book; "The Empty Pot" and how it ties into the 10ninety message.
Sam and Mason talk to Mitch Whetman as he discusses the tragedy of his sister taking her own life when she was sixteen years old. Suicide is a big issue especially in Utah. Talking about it more is something we believe may help and bring awareness to such a sad issue. We were impressed with Mitch and his willingness to discuss difficult issues that hit so close to him and his family. Whitney Whetman had a family life that was full of love, care, peace, support, and friendly competition. She loved all sports and activites but basketball was her true love. She was proud to be a member of the WJHS Lady Jags basketball team where she had many sisters and inspired a strong camaraderie. Her big smile and fun personality will always be missed.
Cristie North sits down with Sam Josie and Mason Sawyer to discuss the tragic loss of her son Taylor who took his own life on January 6, 2017. Cristie shares some powerful words of wisdom in this episode focused on mental health and suicide prevention. Cristie has started her own podcast: Pieces of a Women as well as starting the Taylor Hagen Foundation which focuses on suicide prevention. Crisite is a great example of taking something so terrible and trying to make something great out of it.
Sam and Mason answer questions sent in by listeners out of their peaky blinders hat. Topics include: dating, sam overcoming discrimination, Kortni's favorite quote, who will win the nba finals, tattoos, disabilites, types of therapy and more.
Sam and Mason sit down with Porter Larsen who shares his powerful story of when he lost his brother Racer in a skydiving accident and then 10 years later loses his Dad to a brain aneursym.
Sam and Mason discuss The Parable of the Raft which they heard from Noah Rashetta's podcast: Secular Buddhism. Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go" -Hermann Hesse
"Life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you respond to it." -Charles Swindoll Thank you Tim and Becky Graff.
Sam and Mason discuss The Parable of the Raft which they heard from Noah Rashetta's podcast: Secular Buddhism. Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go" -Hermann Hesse