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Parker lost his wife, Jordan Lynae Terry, age 28. She passed away December 18, 2023, in Tucson, Arizona from complications incident to childbirth. A perfect full-term baby boy, Mack Jordan Terry, also passed away on December 17, 2023, during the birth. He weighed 9 pounds and 4 ounces, measuring 20 inches in length. Parker and Jordan planned an at home birth which turned into Parker slowly watching his wife and baby die. Victoria Alexander says; "There are three needs of the griever. To find the words for the loss, to say the words aloud and to know that the words have been heard." Jordan and Mack passed away about 5 months ago, the strength Jordan has to talk about it is inspiring to me. Thank you for finding the words and saying them Jordan, they will definitely be heard by our 10ninety tribe.

Chad Petersen

Shame and guilt are emotions that we all have. We all feel bad for some things we have done or haven't done. It is part of the human experience. I think that is why jesus told those dudes who were trying to stone that lady to death to only throw a stone if you have no shame or guilt. "He without sin" (shame and guilt) cast the first stone. We have created a culture where we don't talk about shame and guilt, ever. Even though it impacts us all greatly in our day to day life. Chad drove under the influence as an 18 year old kid, got into a car crash and paralyzed one of his best friends. Years later, Chad was moving along with life again. Got married, had a family and was doing well despite the guilt he had. Then one day as his family was getting ready for a family vacation he was backing out of the driveway and didnt know his 2 year old daughter Natalie was riding her bike. He accidently hit her, they rushed her to the hospital and then were told that she was gone. In a world full of people who don't want to talk about shame and guilt, I am proud of Chad for being willing to talk about his. Hearing his story has helped me a lot and I know it will help many of our listeners. As bad as the guilt and shame must be for Chad, he still had one quesiton to answer. What am I going to do about it?

Race Sawyer AKA Deuces Wild

I invited my sister shannon, brother sage, sister carlie, and sis in law keshia (Races Wife) to my house on January 17th to celebreate races birthday. I told them I want to sit around and talk about race. I said I want to record it and upload it to the 10nintey podcast so hopefully 200 years from now races great great great grandkids can know how cool he was listening to some of these stories. The accident is fresh on our mind and the conversation was hard. I love my family so incredibly much. I am so blessed to have the parents and siblings that i do. Race I miss you so much bro. Grief over Race has been much different than grief over Rider and Kortni and Riggins and Franki. I wish i talked to my brother more. i wish he knew how much i looked up to him and how much i loved him. im not sure why i didnt talk to him as much as i wished i did when he was still alive. this is not a usual 10/90 podcast. no sam, no sponsor, not really a 10/90 message just my siblings talking about race. the podcast is similar to a journal for me, so im happy to post this today. the quality of the audio isnt great. there was 5 of us spread out across two mircrophones. ryan garner is mad at me that I didnt use his special microphones. sorry my grammer sucks. LIVE WILD!

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