All Episodes

#99- Riggins 9th Birthday

Riggins would have turned 9 today which is hard to believe. I still hear his sweet voice and cute laugh when he was 5 about to turn 6. I love and miss you so much Riggins. Happy 9th Birthday.

July 25, 2021 - Keshia, Faith, Ran

I have my sister in law Keshia, niece Faith and nephew Ran on to talk about what July 25, 2021 was for each of us and what we were doing when we got the news. Talking about Trauma is hard. There is so much my family has not talked about still. The more you talk, the easier it becomes to find the right words. It takes effort, just like anything else in life. I'm so proud of my family in this episode. 3 years later it still hurts the same, maybe worse. The more time goes on the more I havent seen them. That is really difficult to accept. What I have learned so far is how much I really loved Kortni, Riggins, Franki, Race and Rider. Death has shown me that. I have learned that the gratitude, the joy, the love, the growth to be had from this horror is located in the same place as the pain. I ran from the pain for so long but that was also causing me to run away from Kortni and Riggins and Franki and Race and Rider. It still hurts, really bad. Continuing to talk about them and how I feel on the inside as allowed me to also find gratitude and love along with the pain now. I didnt have that at the beginning. Kortni, Riggins, Franki, Race, Rider. We love you and miss you so much. I never thought this would be our life and journey together. But it is, so what are we going to do about it?

Kortni Sawyer

"I remember when I turned 33" I am 6 months older than Kortni and so every time she had a birthday I would say "I remember when I turned..." I think she laughed hard the first time I did it and then rolled here eyes for the next 15 years when I did it haha. Where I am currently at in my grief journey is having the idea that Kortni and Riggins and Franki are somewhere. I am not sure what form or shape that is in but they are somewhere together and it is a struggle for them. Just like it is a struggle for Blue and I and the rest of our family. Kortni always found a way to help people and have a positive influence in the worst of circumstances. Even though Kortni is dealing with grief too I know she would be handling it well with a combo of grace and fury. She keeps me going, she gets me out of bed. She has always been a great leader and role model to me. I got to have some Kortni's friends on. (sorry to all the freinds we didnt have on haha kort would have felt bad) Thank you to her friends Shelbi and Madi who went to middle school with Kortni and played high school basketball with her. We had Kort's friend Aria on too who worked as a nurse with Kortni. My absolute favorite thing is hearing stories about Kortni, especially ones I have never heard of before. So thank you to Shelbi, Madi and Aria I felt Kortni's spirit so strongly talking to all of you at the same time. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KORTNI! LOVE YOU FOREVER.

Conner Furu

Got to talk with Conner Furu and what he has been through in his life. We both talked a lot about how sports has played a pivotal role in our lives. It was fun to relate with someone like him in that way.  Conner is a man of his word and you get a sense of his integridy and accountability in this episode I think. One of my favorite quotes from him says; "The inferno of our grief is fueled by our refusal to acknowledge it, and extinguished by our attempts to undertand it." Grief at times does feel like an inferno and I think Conner is right. If you refuse to talk about it then it only feeds it and makes it bigger. Only by talking about it can you actually extinguish it. Thanks for showing up and being on our show Conner

Franki's 5th Birthday/ Kortni and my 11th Anniversary

June 29th is Franki's Birthday. I miss you so much Frank, can't believe you would be 5! June 29th is also Kortni and my 11th anniversary. I wrote you guys a letter and wanted to read it on here so we would always have it. I love and miss you both so much.

Kortni Sawyer: Happy Birthday

This is not a normal 10/90 episode, Sam was not in on this one. Mason sits down with Kortni's siblings Jordin, Jared and Chad and talk about Kortni on her birthday. Kortni's sister KC was really sick and couldn't make it, so that was a bummer. Wanted to have memories of Kortni so Blue and his kids and whoever else can know how incredible she was. Love you Kortni, happy birthday, SLAPSHOT REGATTA

questions sent in by listeners

Thank you for the questions sent in and all the support from our 10ninety listeners! Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% what your going to do about it.

Tangled: Franki's favorite movie

Sam and Mason dicuss Franki's favorite movie Tangled in honor of Mason and Kortni's 10 year anniversary and Franki's 4th Birthday. Franki: Happy Birthday Princess. Today you would have turned four. I am grateful and cherish the life you had and the joy you gave everyone including me. I am haunted by what once was mine. Haunted by the future and what could/should have been. Love you forever and always Franki. Kortni: How lucky am I to love someone so much to feel this miserable. Death and pain has shown me how much love I truly have for you. Trying my hardest without you. Haunted by what could have been and so lucky to have what we did. I'd go through hell over and over again if it meant being with you and having Riggins, Blue, and Franki. Slapshot regatta! Love you always and forever. Happy 10 year anniversary Kort.

Jeff Olsen

After a horrific automobile accident took the lives of his wife and youngest son, also inflicting multiple life-threatening injuries to Jeff (including the amputation of his left leg) he found the courage to survive over 18 surgeries and eventually heal both physically and emotionally. At the time of his accident, Olsen had incredible Out-of-Body and Near-Death Experiences, bringing him insights not common in today’s world. Jeff has integrated these experiences into everyday life, inspiring others to embrace the beauty around them and choose joy in all they do. Olsen’s latest book, WHERE ARE YOU? is a collaboration with his oldest son Spencer, who also survived the accident at the age of seven. They have captured in a simple and powerful way their healing journey through the innocent perspective of that seven year old child. “Where Are You?” is a heartfelt book for all ages and perfect for anybody who misses someone. Among Jeff’s many accomplishments, he is most fulfilled by simply being a husband, father and friend. *we copied and pasted this from the internet. No one from 10/90 wrote this discription.

No Regrets

My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do not do it-you will regret both. -Sören Kierkegaard

Preston Schooley

Sam and Mason sit down with Preston Schooley and discuss how he turned down a safe, high paying job to pursue his dream as a tattoo artist. Preston also talks about his divorce and how life is 10% what happens to you and 90% what you do about it. Preston did a lot of sweet tattoos for me that have a lot of meaning, and he crushed them all. Thanks Preston!

Monkeys, Zebras and Job

Sam Josie is back! On this episode of The 10 Ninety Podcast Mason and Sam discuss a story about monkeys in a cage trying to get a banana, zebras with targets on them, and the alleged true story of Job from The Bible.

Wyatt Kline: Mothers Day Episode

We smiled back at death today. Had Wyatt Kline on our podcast an 18 year old senior from Roy High School in Northern Utah. Wyatt's mom took her own life when he was 15 years old. Wyatt was the one who found his mothers body. Wyatt has a 10ninety mindset and we were blown away with how strong he is. Part of the 10ninety message is we is greater than me. Mason's wife Kortni was a prime example of this in her day to day life. She genuily put her kids first and loved it. Motherhood in general comes with the territory of we is greater than me. Happy Mothers Day

Questions Part 2

Sam and Mason answer questions sent in by listeners. They did more than one question this time. Thank you for all the support we have gotten. Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% what you're going to do about it.

Episode 20 (part 1)

Sam and Mason talk with Becky and Tim Graff, who lost their two daughters. McKinzley, "Kinzley" (age 7) and Elexia, "Ellie" (age 3) in a flash flood. Becky wrote a powerful book: "Swept Away" focusing on grief and acceptance. We appreciate Tim and Becky for being vulnerable and brave enough to talk about such a difficult thing.

Episode 21

Sam and Mason talk about New Year resolutions after having a heavy episode with Tim and Becky Graff. The conversation steered more to God, what heaven is like, and what Jesus is like and of course, movies. Sam and Mason appreciate the fact that they can agree to disagree and still be great friends. "life is 10% what happens to you and 90% what your going to do about it"

Episode 22 (Puss n Boots)

Sam and Mason talk about the new Puss in Boots movie that fits in well with the 10ninety message. This episode is dedicated to Dan Hesketh and his family. Dan lost his wife Elizabeth (44) Son Ashton (11) Daughter Kylie (10) in a terrible accident in British Columbia on March 11, 2022. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. One day at a time.

Episode 23: Ride in Paradise

Brad Behle sits down with Sam and Mason to discuss his book "Ride in Paradise." The book tells the story of Brad's brother Jason and his battle with prescription drugs which ended up taking his life. Brad is a great example of making something great happen out of something so terrible. If you battle with opioid addiction please talk to someone.

Episode 24: Questions

Sam and Mason answer questions sent in by listeners. -when did sam realize he was different? -what are the benefits of sams dwarfism -the most powerful thing mason was told after the accident -Does Blue talk about his mom, siblings, uncle and cousin -Ex girlfriends -and more

Episode 25: The Kings Highway

Sam and Mason talk about how life is more simple than we sometimes make it. Waiting for something shiny and new isn't what's stopping you from enjoying life. Honor your life by being grateful for what you have right now.

Brandon Vega: Ghetto Conscious (EATN)

Sam and Mason sit down with Brandon Vega, the author of Ghetto Conscious and creator of the EATN project. Brandon shares his incredible story of growing up in a tough neighborhood (to say the least) in Florida and how he was able to break the narrative and find success through his E.A.T.N. philosiphy.

Zach Josie: Ironman Athlete

Zach Josie has a rare form of dwarfism and is currently training for another Ironman. Zach is a great example of facing obstacles, accepting his circumstances, and moving forward despite that physical competition is harder for him. His drive is inspirational!

Race Sawyer AKA Deuces Wild

I invited my sister shannon, brother sage, sister carlie, and sis in law keshia (Races Wife) to my house on January 17th to celebreate races birthday.  I told them I want to sit around and talk about race. I said I want to record it and upload it to the 10nintey podcast so hopefully 200 years from now races great great great grandkids can know how cool he was listening to some of these stories. The accident is fresh on our mind and the conversation was hard. I love my family so incredibly much. I am so blessed to have the parents and siblings that i do. Race I miss you so much bro. Grief over Race has been much different than grief over Rider and Kortni and Riggins and Franki. I wish i talked to my brother more. i wish he knew how much i looked up to him and how much i loved him. im not sure why i didnt talk to him as much as i wished i did when he was still alive. this is not a usual 10/90 podcast. no sam, no sponsor, not really a 10/90 message just my siblings talking about race. the podcast is similar to a journal for me, so im happy to post this today. the quality of the audio isnt great. there was 5 of us spread out across two mircrophones. ryan garner is mad at me that I didnt use his special microphones. sorry my grammer sucks. LIVE WILD!

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Episode 19 The Raft

Sam and Mason discuss The Parable of the Raft which they heard from Noah Rashetta's podcast: Secular Buddhism. Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go" -Hermann Hesse

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